Only in The Scottish Farmer bake off, could you find the Gallagher brothers, Elvis, and Bugs Bunny all in the same tent as royalty.

This year’s annual cake competition had the theme set by last year’s winner Lynsey Clark, and it had to be a ‘celebrity’ cake.

Eight entries came in, and it was a tough job for the good ladies of Luss WRI, who were judging at Kilbarchan’s industrial tent on Saturday.

There can only be one winner, and this year Philippa Stephen was first past the post, with a detailed cake featuring the celebrity rabbit, Bugs Bunny. Philippa admitted that she had ‘upped her game’ this year, after investigating the full appeals procedure to no avail last year, when she claimed that she ‘was robbed’.

Not this year, and all the practice that Philippa put in when she painstakingly spent hours creating cake toppers of the bride and groom for her sister’s wedding recently, paid off.

For our competition, she opted for a Bugs Bunny cake, sitting among a pile of carrots, with individually made carrot toppers (squeezed through a garlic press – top tip), and it impressed the judges who left the following comment: “Well executed, with good modelling skills, and a nice clean finish.”

In second place with an ‘Elvis in Las Vegas’ cake, was Catherine Laurenson, receiving a top three position for the third year in a row. It had an Elvis figure perched on the edge of the cake, but unfortunately his quiff was squished by the box it came in!

In third place was Lynsey Clark with her ‘Celebrity fall out’ cake, which featured the Gallagher brothers from Oasis, a favourite band of Lynsey’s, depicting their recent public fall out.

Amusingly, editor Alasdair Fletcher entered a Barbie cake, which involved taking a hacksaw to Barbie’s infamous long legs, in order to change her from a 6ft blonde, to a stumpy 5ft 1” bleach blonde bachle, to get her to fit into his sponge cake base.

The judges mistook Barbie for Katie Price/Jordan – same assets, but different hair colour. Alasdair is at pains to make sure I mention that he received a ‘highly commended’ from the judges.

In fifth place with a commended, was Ken Fletcher (our award winning chef, you know), with another Elvis cake, this time in profile, representing Elvis in his tubby Vegas years.

Rolling about at the bottom of the barrel were the more unusual interpretations of celebrity. Patsy Hunter entered a huge cow pat cake, with an England football player shoved head first into the iced plop. Gordon Davidson claims to have been making a social statement on the paparazzi’s intrusion on celebrities’ private lives, by entering a cake depicting Princess Diana’s fatal car crash, with a photographer standing over the overturned limo.... I know, I know, the editor is still sweating on whether to put the picture into the paper.

And finally, my homage to the most well known celebrity there is in Britain, HRH the Queen. Unfortunately, (get ready for the excuse), my cake did go through a couple of dramatic procedures before it made it to show day.

Firstly, I knocked over the bottle of red food colouring which covered my kitchen in a massacre coloured puddle of dye, along with splashing the Queens face with a covering of pox-like spots.

Cotton buds dipped in water cleared up the worst of the pox, and I popped the cake into the coolest room in the house, on top of all the other cakes which were boxed. I didn’t figure on the geriatric collie’s nose still being in working order, and she duly managed to sniff out the cake pile and licked off one half of my union jack – which was mostly blue, then she moved her big blue tongue right over the Queen’s nose, turning it a nice shade of lavender. Having no time to repair the flag properly, the queen just had to go to the show with her blue nose and dog dribble over one half of the flag. It was duly noted by the judges and ignored in the prize list.

Philly will now have the task of deciding the theme for next year’s challenge (I’m voting for vegetable animals) and our cakes will see a fitting end when they are demolished in the SF office.