NOTHING NEW in keeping cattle fenced in, but has an East Renfrewshire farmer developed a new safeguard - traffic barriers.

A young bullock was finding it a bit hard to moo-ve this week - after its head was wedged in a barrier leaving it in the horns of a dilemma.

The hapless animal was discovered wandering in a field near Newton Mearns.

Adam Kenny, an engineer from Merseyside, who was working in a site nearby tried to release the animal.

But the bullock gave him short shift. He was headbutted and knocked about five metres. He said: "We asked the farmer if he wanted help to take the barrier off its head, but he was not overly concerned, saying 'it will come off in good time'. I hope he was right."

Smashing time

IT MUST have been a nightmare insurance form to fill in and receive after a recent crash in South-west Scotland.

The nub is that a Johnny McIntosh ran into another Johnny McIntosh, who was driving a car owned by another Johnny McIntosh! Three generations of the clan from Dunragit were involved in a vehicular confrontation which resulted in two right-offs - one of the farm pick-ups - a silver Toyota - and a metallic grey Freelander.

To put you in the picture, youngest of the trio, Johnny, sometimes drives about in grandpa Johnny's Freelander, as he was that fateful day. While he was on the hands-free remonstrating with his father, Johnny, who was on the hands-free in the Toyota, they both came hurtling around a corner and into each other.

There is one problem. Neither of the younger versions has had the heart to the most senior Johnny that his car is no longer.

Well, he kens noo!!!