"This is our DISNY IT system - that disnae work, that disnae work and that disnae work either!"

OVERHEARD from some sages at Dingwall Mart, who were recently discussing the fate of a German sailor who had died at sea and rescuers found his mummified body weeks later, with his head in his hands.
“I guess he was waiting for his Single Farm Payment too,” said one of the wags.