DUMBARTONITE turned Fifer, John Paul, must have someone up above on his side.

His favourite couple of days out is to Kintyre Show and being of an age to qualify for a bus pass, he tends to make full use of it. However, after watching the West Coast Motors bus to Campbeltown whizz past him at the Barloan roundabout in Dumbarton, he was all a quandary as to what to do.

Stuck without a nearby car, John was contemplating what to do next, when he became aware of a farm-style pick-up (ie, covered in muck) waiting next to him for the traffic lights to turn green. Then the driver and passenger gave him a wave.

A conversation was started which soon ascertained, believe it or not, that the couple in the pick-up were actually travelling to Kintyre Show!

So John grabbed his valise and got into the pick-up with them ... soon passing the bus to Campbeltown. His saviours were none other than the Ayrshire cattle judge, Christine Sanderson and her husband, David, from Thackwaite Hall, near Carlisle – and better than that, they dropped him off at his digs for the night with the Piries, at Machrihanish Home Farm.

You couldn’t have made that one up!

Missing the boat!

I DON’T care what everyone says about Caledonian MacBrayne – I still think they’re alright!

After a busy day at Islay Show, followed by The Raider’s cask-tasting at Bruichladdich the next day, the early start for the 7.00am ferry to the mainland proved almost too much for me and companions, John Sharp and Willie Carruth, from Renfrewshire.

And so it was that the threesome had the ‘walk of shame’ on to the Heb Isles when the CalMac ferry boys allowed the rear door to be dropped to allow them on to the ship!

Still, it left plenty of time to enjoy Mid Argyll Show!

Missing the combine!

ONE OF the other casualties from Islay’s hospitality was big Brian ‘Packie’ Paxton, who really should know better.

Luckily for him, octogenarian John ‘I used to play for Queen of the South’ Beck, was there to put him to bed ... at 9.00pm!

Poor Packie was obviously on the run from his travelling companions who were constantly pointing out that the big contractor ‘really should’ve been at hame on a combine.’

Drew gets his kit on!

THE WHOLE of Dumfries and Galloway can heave a collective sigh of relief – Dumfries contractor, Drew Watson, has had his new combine delivered with air conditioning.

As The Raider reported last week, little old ladies in the locale of Mouswald had the life-threatening vision of Drew with nothing but boxer shorts and rigger boots up to his oxters in the front end of a Claas combine.

The strange attire was necessary because of a bust air-conditioning unit. We are pleased to report blood pressure levels have fallen following the delivery of a brand new Claas Lexion 630.

One of Drew’s colleagues commented: “Luckily, we have managed to get Drew to put his clothes back on, having convinced him this one has working air conditioning. There is no further requirement for him to strip to his boxer shorts and rigger boots unless he wants to!”

“This incident illustrates the lengths Drew Watson Agri Services will go to in order to ensure the job is done!”

(Photo, above right, courtesy www.amlair.co.uk).